I got a message from a friend today too on my way to the restroom. He was unhappy about my aunts words being too preachy and too long. And he wanted me to agre with him. He was not too happy that i didnt laugh with him and his buddy. All i said was the truth. I looked at his friend that was co giggling at my aunt and i looked at him and i said... you mean YOUR aunt? Then he starts giving me shit. I dont break stride but as i pass into the bathroom i said one word. Dick. So he follows me into the bathroom. Being tough guy. Saying he wasnt singling her out, everyone was a bad speaker. He lists his brothers who had droned on about their greatness. I stop him and say i dont care. Say what you want about the dudes. Just dont talk shit with your friends about the bitches in the family because thats what a bitch does. He went into his tough guy act and said lets take it outside. I said we in yhe restroom. Why go cause a scene. Lets go bitch. He hemmed and hawed and pretended to raise his fist and spun around saying if only it wasnt his dads wake. I pressed him and called him a bitch a couple .ore times. He backpeddled into the toilet stall. So i started mocking him and went hard. Told him he always been a bitch since we were kids. Then i said something about his wife being right about him being a bitch. I dont know how that happened. It was a low blow in the heat of the moment. My aunt is more like my mom while my mom is more like my lilte sister. Always has been since i was a pup. Thats why i slipped and went dirty bringing his wife into it for a quick jab on my way out. But he didnt follow me out lol. And i waited outside the building for 5 minutes. Plus he asked to take it outside. Them fighting words. And he and his brothers always talk shit about my aunt. Just not in front of me. But i caught his dumb ass. Later we crossed pass as i was walking with my aunt. He gave me a look. I preceded to call him my bitch repeatedly. Same with the people lol holding him back lol. My old 7th grade teacher. I had fun calling him a bitch. Told him he thr biggest bitch. Dude is 6 foot 4 and big and always jumps on the side of the other big fuckers and helps to hild me down. Because i would let him out of respect. He was my teacher for 3 years. But he protected the strong and villified the weak for years because it helped him become the head elder. Now the church is split. So is my family. Ragnarok Day 1 First mini boss down. So far so good. I got 99 bitches to go. If i had some friends with me i would have chopped down some more of these giant trees. As it was they all acted stiff around me. I stayed and helped put away tables and tents. He and his brother left so they wouldnt cross my path again. He knew i would call him my bitch for asking for a fight then running when i smiled wide and called him a bitch for talking like a tough guy mafioso gangster lol These guys watch too many movies. Yall know its predictive programming right? There was a shitload of people. My Tio Beto would have been proud. That im finally doing the duty he asked me to do. Taking care of his sons for him. And making sure they treat his daughters, sisters and, nieces the way they want their mom and their daughters treated. And im not close to done. Because apart from his bad boys he also left me many more duties. And some gifts. Most importantly his big Harley boots. Half a size too big for me. I just almost was able to fill his boots. But im still growing. Im the run of the family. Thats just cuz they damaged my ankles my back my neck and my hips. I could never beat them before. They always ganged up on me. Kicked my ass and kicked me out of church. Got my ass kicked everytime i stepped foot after i was banished for not putting up with their evil cult shit. They all got money now. Been living soft. And are above fighting. But they dont know it yet. They still think they tough. But they dont trust in the quality of their own wood. Thats what happens when your mouth and attitude and gym lol muscles have kept you bullying cowards for 20 years. You no longer know who you are. Yoi dont trust your instincts. Because you lost them. And the spirit doesnt stay with you forever. If you sell it for a life of luxury and you then try to go and reach for it you will find nothing. And you can never find it again. God help you. Bevause you know the old saying. The higher up they are. The longer they fall from grace. And i only fight big game. In the houses of the holy. Doing my lords work.
size 12 was always slightly too small but try finding 12.5 this year i finally fully fit a 13 and it feels good sorry your having to deal w nonsense and of course the harder they fall
Yoi should shop at the womens shoe clearance isle at tj maxx. They got rows of extra large sizes expensive mens shoes there for 25 30 bucks. I got a pair of size 12 LeBrons in laker gold years before he came to the team for cheap. Always got my uncle shoes there. He was also 13. I could maybe go up to 12.5. I have in a pinch but i feel like a clown. I fine to sound like a clown but not look like one. The nonsense was not bad at all from my pov. Ive been working in for months. Just that it was the wrong guy who got it first. He wasnt even in my radar. His offenses were the least. He was never evil to my mom. My horns were for his older brother. The slick orator with two tongues. But he stayed way away from me. He can hear the footsteps coming. He sees me on campus often. I been helping out at the english side of the church. I been coming around the family a lot more. He knows his dads not around to protect him by reminding me about family first. Family first only means family image first. For some people. So im breaking some images. And i got my two nephews in the loop seeing things in real time. And most importantly i got my mom on my side. Over her family. That has treated her like a slave because of her circumstances. In the old world mentality the poorer sides of the family are valued on par with indentured servants to the more prestigious sides of the family who feels a righteousness from being of good christian or catholic stock wholly in good standing with the local don/priest/pastor. They view sevitude as the natural cause of sin aka bad choices. So if you are poor its you or your parents bad choices. So its socially acceptable for you to enslave your own family I worked with a chinese family who had another chinese family of 3 living in a hidden closet in the warehouse. In an industrial sector under the 605. They ate my lunch if i left it in the fridge overnight. Their closet/room opened up to our break room. One morning i saw footprints in front of the wall but going halfway into the wall. It was a false wall they could slide after we clocked out. They cleaned the office and kept the wahouse neat. Backb to scandal. Nephew came to spend the night and debrief. Wait that sounds bad lol Anyhow he says my older cousin was so angry thay he got in his truck amd left. Saying it was because if he saw me again during the night he would kill me. Now this a dude who was gonna get deported but i took his place behind the wheel after a dui checkpoint had him pull to the side. I told him to switch seats and i took the cops on a chase down the streets of la puente and the little neighborhood of valinda where i hid in some random garage that was left open. I know its petty of me to go back to oh i did this for him i did that. But it feels like shit for people that you risk your neck over to constantly try to intimidate or gaslight you because it fuels their personal power. And slaves serve at the whims of personal power. So pray for me guys. This cousin of mine has a full arsenal of legal weapons. Big gun safes kind of guy. So maybe i need a new bb gun.
i don't pray but i do shop the clearance aisles at shoe stores used to find value but seems like mostly clown shoes at this point strange you should mention the womens section since i am literally awakening from the latest of increasingly psychedelic dreams in this one i had just welcomed Johnny Cash into my room and he was explaining how fat men had a distinct advantage acting like fat women and that he wasn't going to be signing on for one of those torture tours those country acts used do some shadowy figure had easily convinced him to sign again and he was laughing and carving his signature in my hardwood floor w his boot heel this was pissing me off momentarily but then i thought about what an epic story it would be then he was laying on the floor and became obsessed w what he said was a bat in my room it was descending into a bad madness when my phone rang and its an old realtor friend i bumped into yesterday greasing the wheels on the front gate as some good folks left w a truck load of shelving i was selling in the continuous purge of my mortal possessions lol i'm sure realtor friend has some great ideas about selling my mom's acreage that couldn't wait until after 730 lol but i have loved her long time so i'll call her in a minute btw i gave away my daughters beloved rocking horse (after calling her for the ok in SF of course) to the good folks who bought the shelving it was out and their 2 yr old boy fell in love playing on it as we were loading shelving so it was a natural and life goes on not sure why the next thing i thought of was to find out what rube was doing but i think reading your story along w expanding sobriety may be responsible for this dream madness so for that i'm grateful since its great fun and as real as anything i experience while i'm awake at times in full color and in total control of the experience i embrace what some people might consider a curse because its absolutely not real and means nothing it isn't always fun like the nightmare nap from yesterday that had me and my friends in total political despair that wasn't repairable and life would never be the same the pain and regret was physical and powerful but as always i chose to end that episode and wake up spent the evening talking w neighbors at my gf's jacuzzi on a gorgeous night watching redtails and laughing at each other more or less relaxed as hell we spent a fantastic 10 minutes and she fell asleep while i watched some hbo show about alligators and sharks eating each other i left to come back home to the still apoplectic still skunk laced akita that lives in my room and watch the rest of the show which was now killer whales eating great white livers it was late and the internet was going on and off so i just closed my eyes guess i'll unplug everything and reboot since the wires seem a little crossed while trying to listen to my email that the realtor left it was asking for a password it never did before that i recall i finally guessed it and heard some crazy ass voicemails that included one from @huh? that is probably old like some of the others ty for the well wishes and apologies for being less than accessible when it comes to my phone see the thing is i have no idea if any of this shit is real other than when i look into my daughters eyes which i will be doing soon...the 16th to be exact i hope i made you chuckle rube and i hope you walk away from that bad energy because you have a choice find something better to dream about brother and pull the plug and reboot
driving the ex to LAX on Wed to fly to Sri Lanka tried to talk her out of it but she's determined to go spread her fathers ashes have land holdings there but i doubt they'll be worth much for the next few decades shame their thieving leaders lead them to this dark place have no food but at least that ESG rating is as high as it gets sorry if my dream states freaked anyone out
Sometimes people pray. They just dont know it at the time. Sometimes people answer prayers. That somebody else prayed. I loved the read man. I can relate in my own way. I kicked the bottle too. Well the bong. Physically kicked it and broke it. There was a demon in it. A demon trappping me inside of it. But maybe the demon was just holding me back for the appropriate time. My dreams been different the past few weeks for me too. Because i was kinda like christina aguilera in that bottle. You gotta rub me the right way. But then the rub comes off the glass like greased light... Ill stop there before i break into song. You a lucky man to have such a beautiful baby you get to protect. I seen pictures and shes a beaut. One of the finest girls i ever knew was from that funky little island as your ex. The sands are shifting over there and in all the islands in the greater pacific. Ragnarok is a worldwide event. I should take tour advice. The high road is the best road. But then i see your example. Its telling me the low road is fun. And it gets the job done. Its too late now. Im public enemy 1. Even my closest cousin is torn. But not his son. And not his sisters son either. They know the difference berween the truth and the lie. I told you i was raising stocks. Big beefy brahma bulls. One dark and one light. One a clannish highlander and the other a humble hood from the hood. Tomorrow we gonna see if they pay dividends. If their horns come in. Yesterday was the wake. Its thirty minutes to midnight. In 8 and a half hours is the visitation of the body. And at high noon he will be thrown into the abyss. For now. We believe in soul sleep. The soul and the body are one. And both are reborn when your soul gets woke.
just for the record i'm not really all that interested in "kicking" the bottle i also have no intention of fading into the darkness that's closer to all of us in one way or the other than we likely want to admit my dreams have been a constant source of joy/madness throughout my life probably should have seen a psychologist in my youth as the issues w death alone nearly destroyed my ability to cope but i kept it to myself cause i was horrified only had one friend in my life i was able to share that darkness with and as cathartic as it was we no longer speak of it because its useless unless we're laughing about how stupid we are i don't think there's anything unique about how i view anything tbh but i also haven't met all that many who see it the same or care to talk about it and as i've grown older the dream states have become far more outrageous and often intense probably because i encouraged it idk maybe surrealist has always felt like home to me w the exception of buying in to my demons which include anger anger is the true motherfucker that eats us alive and is almost always the source of my problems i'll always have roots in sobriety because its more a state of mind than an abstinence from chemicals chemicals are great until they aren't is about all you can say about them anyway anger, yeah that's what kills us while we think we do damage to those we hate don't fuck w that
In babylon even some of the elect think el diablo and ha satan are the same thing. Ha satan knows all the right words to say to manupulate you into thinking hes so cool you believe every word he says and sign on the dotted line. The devil i know doesnt work like that. He gave me a good example to follow. To kick the bottle and to stand up and fight.
funny thing is i was trying to connect w rube when i saw all that anger which is unusual for him so the rest of that just came out i'm in as good a place as i can remember atm and in FACT took a dump yesterday that made be feel proud looking back at it i admired how straight and strong it was , fully complete and with purpose i felt it would break the bowl upon banishment but alas it too washed out to sea...but not before i had the gf take a look at the broken toilet! was hearing how disgusting i was until this morning which only puffed my chest more ah GGGR what a great movie and a great scene indeed actually had the chance to talk to Alec about that movie at his house but we quickly digressed into his snl skit of canteen boy and he left for his limo laughing
Do us a favor and join her in Russia, LeBron. https://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id...tes-efforts-bring-brittney-griner-home-russia
used to go to 10-15 games a year haven't watched a game in person or on tv since kobe's farewell maybe the game has passed me by, but it just stopped feeling like my team
he wants little black kids in diapers punching cops and calling them bitches can't stand to see his face https://nypost.com/2022/07/12/video-shows-child-hit-and-swear-at-cop-in-minnesota/ btw this is a hard video to find if you haven't seen it
But you are connecting. I didnt go to the showing of the body this morning. And i didnt go to the funeral this afternoon. My family thinks i was high and called one of my cousins a bitch for trying to intimidate me out of his guilty conscience from me accidentally running into him talking shit about my aunt after i ignored it. He said to take it outside so i called him a bitch for talking like hes gonna give me a beating or something if i dont go and join in with the shit talking about my aunt to give him cover. For thr sake of my dead uncle his father i cant allow that kind of shit attitude in my cousin to continue. Ive given him and his family cover at my expense for decades. So whenever he crossed my path i called him a bitch until he left the premises after the second encounter from the rage/shame of not being able to take a swing while i stick out my chin. But if i went to these functions today it would get worse and it would be in front of his mom and sisters and kids and wife. And older brothers who will kick my ass for him any time. I never back down = im always a problem. Well when im not in the bottle. I dont want his mom to suffer, specially right now. They are grieving. I was told this morning that she wasnt going to the showing because she was short of breath but what if shes stressing over her son being all worked up oiling his guns talking about how hes gonna kill me? Dude has a big ass safe with a bunch of ARs and pistols etc... This dude was a guerilla as a middle schooler before coming to america at 18 but his parents has faked docs showing he was 14 so he could enter as HS a freshman and be elliglbe for visa. So when i heard that news and that her daughter had fainted as soon as she got to the showing i froze in my boots and decided not to go. Texted my nephew i wasn going. No violance. Missed a chance to see my favorite speaker speak. Bunch of great orators flew in from all around the world. Even the big man my uncle considered the current chief of chiefs. This was my last best chance to meet him again. And all my uncles sons will get a chance to kiss the ring of his ass lol. All her sons except maybe 2 hated their dad. And all his sons with other mothers hated him too. I am basically uniting the family in being scared of me for different reasons. But at least they are finally coming together. Over me.
