KERSHAW: "What are you up to Tim?" WALLACH: "I'm changing the lineup card to fuck up Dumbass." KERSHAW: "That's fucken awesome!" WALLACH: "Think so?... I got you behind the plate hitting 2nd." KERSHAW: "Wow, what a dick!" WALLACH: "Funny, your wife said the same thing last night." KERSHAW: "Wow, ass!" WALLACH: "Ass to mouth, actually... said she liked the nutty taste of my..." KERSHAW: "Stop it!" WALLACH: "Those words never came out of her mouth, whereas what went in..." KERSHAW: "Okay, I surrender." WALLACH: "You're making this too easy. I could go on all night -- Hey, she said that too!" KERSHAW:
Photographer: Donnie, how about a pose for a nice shot. Dum Dum: Sure thing. (thinking) This is just super neat. I can't wait to watch the ballgame.
Drew: Another tough one up here. Eh Stan? Stan: This is not the kind of familiar I need to get used to. Drew: Now can I fire him? Stan: Shut up and smile for the camera. Drew:
The quality of this picture is staggering. Not being sarcastic, but that is a GREAT photo with incredibly high resolution.
LOPEZ: "Hey Donnie... if you need another player, I'm available." DBB: "Thanks George, but with Puig, Guerrero and now Olivera we've got enough Mexicans." LOPEZ: "Wow, ignorant and racist." DBB: "Yeah, but at least what I do makes people laugh -- which is more than you can say." LOPEZ: "Wow
DBB: "Hey, way to drive the ball Dee!" JROLL: "I swear, if I could kill you and get away with it I would." DBB: "You mean like OJ? Wow, racist. Oh wait, that's your line."" JROLL:
DBB: "How you feeling Carlos?" BARNES: "He's done skip, he's throwing pus." DBB: "You've been here an hour, what the fuck do you know?" BARNES: "I know you're a shitty manager and he's getting shelled." J-ROLL: "Werd." DBB: "Keep out of this Dee." J-ROLL: "I hate you so much."
ELLIS: "I'm really having trouble squaring up the ball. Do you guys have any suggestions?" NOMAR: "Have you thought about another occupation?" ELLIS: "Come on, I'm being serious." NOMAR: "As was I." ELLIS: "Fuck you Nomar. Hey Orel, you were a pitcher." OREL: "A great pitcher." ELLIS: "Fine, fine, What would you do if you were facing me and trying to get me out?" OREL: "Throw the ball." ELLIS: "Fuck you, both of you!
AJ: OK Nomar. So do it like this? Nomar: That's a lot better. You're close. Orel: Nomar. Why don't you grab the bat and show him more directly. Nomar: Good idea. AJ, let me see that bat. AJ: I don't know man. Is that a good idea? Nomar: What do you mean? AJ: I wouldn't want you to get hurt or something and have to miss some broadcasts. Orel:
Dum Dum: Texas double down. Double switch? Flip the switch. Yum. Texas BBQ after the game. I wonder if anyone will join me. Should I ask someone now? It's not as if I have a lot going on. I hope Lopes isnt the one. It's always him. I should call Charlie, Omar and Orel. Wow. This is cool. Baseball in Texas is neat. I wish my name was Prince.
Grady: I know I won't be doing this for very much longer. But I can't even imagine who might manage this team in the future. It is bound to be someone great.
DEE: "Ah Dre, itz gr8 2 c u!" DRE: "Jimmy, what the fuck are you doing in a Marlins uni?" DEE: "Man datz sum funE shit how u punkin Mattingly doe!" DRE: "No really Jimmy, what are you doing?" DEE: "Man Dre I thot we wuz tite." DRE: "Well your Mom was last night... Dee." DEE: "Aw u do rememba dawg... hey, wait... man u suk."
BUNDY: "Hey Davey, I've got a great idea!" LOPES: "Can't wait to hear this one [sarcasm]." BUNDY: "You know how you sometimes send runners my way?" LOPES: "I presume you mean to third base?" BUNDY: "Yeah, but now I gotta better idea..." LOPES: "Oh please God..." BUNDY: "How bout I send them back to you?" LOPES: BUNDY: "Nah, hear me out. They'd never expect it and wouldn't be prepared to deal with it!" LOPES: "Who hired you?" BUNDY: "Not sure really. I used to clean the restrooms, then Ned said they needed to integrate..." LOPES: "Say no more..."
TOMMY: "So, what's your strategy for today?" DONNIE: "We're gonna go out there and give it our best." TOMMY: "No, really." DONNIE: "That's it Tommy, let the chips fall where they may." TOMMY: "You're not a smart man, are you?" DONNIE: "No... not really."
ELLIS: "Just wanted to say, you were my favorite Backstreet Boy." LANCE: "You have no idea how much I hate you right now."